filed in Uncategorized on Apr.24, 2001
Can people really have epiphanies and change, or is fiction just fiction?
« I’m set!
I think you can. Changing is harder then maintaining life as is, so its a challange. But I really think you can, with a firm desire to do so.
We change every moment of every day. The evolution is never ending!
I don’t mean sloughing of dead cells, I mean a fundamental shift in our usness. It happens in fiction all the time, Steven’s realizes he wasted his life and wants to spend the Remains of his Days doing fun stuff, Jack Skellington realizes that he doesn’t need to steal someone elses holiday to have a change of pace and scenery. But does it happen in real life, or only on Oprah?
Why do you think so?
no, I meant in real life. I change so much, at least. I am a completely different person from the me I was a year ago. And so on for many stages of my life. People help change me. I help change me. Outside forces and factors. Self realization. There’s the everyday gradual change, and then there’s also the big slap-you-upside-the-head kind of paradigm shifts that take place in a person’s life. Do you not believe this? Oh, and btw, Oprah is crap. Imnsho.
Because I have done it. If I can do it, it can be done by others.
I think Oprah is incapable of change, which would be why she spends so much of her time trying to force everyone else to change.
Hehe, she can change her weight enough. hehe, I kill me
last night darin was reading this post to me and we were very curious to what kind of comments people would leave.. .. so today I checked it out again and saw that you have had a few new ones here… the question I have for you is.. … .. ..
do you feel that people understood what you asked?
..the reason I am asking is we had found this to be a unique conversation piece as opposed to the cookie cutter question everyone asks |something like|.”is it possible to change (who you are)” I was looking to find some new ideas ..involving the words like epiphanies and fiction….. ..
one idea held was that an epiphanie was not something you forced or was something you could learn or an active choice you made but that it was an sort of enlightment and once that happened you could do nothing but live it.. this was working off only one word of the question.. I know that was not the question I just find this a neat entry and am looking forward to what will be here in the future.. .. . …
I think people understood my question, but not my intent. What I wanted to know is if people fundamentally change after a certain age. I know that people change with their experiences, but I think who you fundamentally are is always the same. One might think it changes, but I think it’s simply a revelation of who you’ve always been. Life is just an ongoing conflict between who we want to be and who we really are, and any changes are just bringing our ambitions down to our abilities.
Are you completely different or are you mostly different? I think that our fundamental quirks stay the same, and we eventually come to terms with them. I think you can change habits, and you can grow as an intellectual person, but can you overcome things like being controlling, or being obsessive about detail? I think people who go through therapy and psychiatry to fix problems like that never really fix them, they just learn to compensate. Eg, if someone equates food with love, they can learn to control their overeating, but at times of great stress or depression they will lose control.
Maybe I’m just drawing from a very limited set of experiences on this topic. I think that’s why I asked the question.
Well, even though I post that I’m a 21-year-old, in real life I’m 43 and I have had extensive experience in this matter. Over the years I have changed to such an extent that even my parents sometimes have difficulty recognizing me. I mean, at Christmas and holidays they cock their heads, look at me, and wonder who spirited away their dear little Audie of old. So see, sonny, these things are just part of life. REAL change is inevitable. And…hey…are you saying that overeating stems from a love affair with food….??? Huh? Oh dear.
I think one does have the choice, that’s why denial is a buzz word.
Here’s a theoretical. Let’s say we have a guy named Joe. Joe prides himself on being tolerant of different people. One day, Joe is very introspective and he realizes that is not tolerant, just apathetic. Now, Joe could decide that he is right, or he could decide he’s just being silly and go on as normal, but with a gnawing fear that he’s not what he thinks he is. But if Joe decides he’s right, where does he go from there? He doesn’t suddenly become tolerant, now he’s at a weird stage where he knows what he is, and he knows what he wants to be, or what he thought he was. If this was literature, he might watch a vivid sunset, symbolizing his clearer sight and the end of his illusion. But in real life, wouldn’t he just be confused and depressed, trying hard to be something he’s not, feeling like his life was a hoax, losing any identity he thought he had?
I guess that’s my real question, is that once someone realizes they aren’t who they thought they were, and accepts it, what happens in real life.
So you’re 43 and you still live with your parents? Interesting. I’m still not convinced that who someone fundamentally is can change. See the Joe hypothetical.
Isn’t one of the causes of overeating feeling unloved as a child and turning to food because it made you feel good (errogenous zone). I think that’s a Freudian thing. Maybe a Behaviorist thing too; you’re parents didn’t make you happy, food did, so eating was reinforced.
Doh, I meant hypothetical, not theoretical.
Ah, so we have a shrink in the house!!! lol
thats not a general question as posed before. This is very specific. The answer relies on the nature of the individual and the realization itself.
This question is one we have shared for our entire lives without necessarily realizing it. I think we all do.
From recent experiences, I’ve discovered that we can change. Maybe not fundamentally, as you say, but we can learn to externalize ourselves in such a way that there is less misunderstanding. I think that there is a fear of fundamental change, and that there are many things that keep us ‘here’ and ‘now’. I think that this is a survival mechanism, but that it can be overcome temporarily. I like to call this temporary event ego-death.
I’d love to talk to you more about this. Maybe start another thread and discuss.
Whatever you want to do; I await your response.
Did you get my email?
No, I did not.
it’s this name A t g to the izzle mail.com.
That is in the vicinity of googleish type things.
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